FINN: "You're driving me crazy with the hovering.
MEREDITH: [sighs] "This could be a mistake. This. Us. You, you, you’re a really nice guy and well, you're, you don't want to get involved with me. If you knew me..."
FINN: "Scary."
MEREDITH: "Finn-"
FINN: "And damaged. See, I told you."

If you knew this would be your last day on Earth.
How would you like to spend it?

Dota, Studies, Basketball, Sleeping and the FuFs... IHG, Sheares, SMG, Ge Yao and all the other stuffs I'm involved in.

There's something I have to leave behind in my life, even though I don't want to. I have to believe it's a matter of choice even though it's not. I can't. I know I can't, though I should but I definitely do not want to.

We're all broken chess pieces of a game called Life
constantly looking for a meaning in the game,
to know our role, to complete ourselves.

Maybe at a certain point in time,
all we need to do is take a step out of the square of the chess board we're on.
Yes, let's take the step. Someone's walking in on the square I'm on.
Too many pieces standing on the same square makes it really uncomfortable.

Maybe someday you'll walk in on my doorway again.
Till then, I'll be content with my new found space,
and getting rid of the persistently irritating chess piece that follows me which ever step I take.

Came back to hall and realised I have no idea where my matric card is. Good thing WeiJie was on his way to do his laundry. He opened the door for me and voila, back in Sheares Hall.

Ally wasn't in her room, tried looking for Shyuan, not there, tried looking for XiangYing... Nope... not there... but good thing I saw ally's slippers outside Serene's door. Lost Reversi to Ally, then played Big2. Goofing around till YuanBin replied Ally. Why? Cos my phone went out of batt. Swee.

Still couldn't find my card back at the FuFs, went back to Ally's but ended up in Alex's to watch Butterfly Effect.

Tried painting each other's nails, but Ally being the smartest being on Earth, dropped the nail polish and it broke. So we had an adventure cleaning up the mess and continue painting nails. My parents are gonna disown me. Woot.

Time ta sleep soon.

And so, I slept my day away. Again.
Watched Grey's Anatomy till 5.30am, slept till 7am. Had breakfast, slept from 8am again and yada yada yada dream yada yada.

Finally woke up at 5pm to know I gotta drive the volleyball girls down to the SRC. And from then on, it was endless driving till 10pm.

The life of an SMB driver.

Maybe we're too nice. Maybe we're giving in to every request. We answer to everyone's transportation needs just because it's IHG and we do have a lorry. We bring you places fast. You ask for it, we do it. And most of the times, it's me and Joshua doing the driving. I'm not saying that the rest of them aren't driving. Just that we do most of it.

And sometimes, you do feel taken for granted. Especially when you're driving a whole team of players and no one wants to sit beside the driver.
Driving the lorry is lonely business.

And when the lorry has broken down, we try our best means to fix it. Yet some people call us and grief us why prior notice was not given that the lorry has broken down. Would I know that the lorry would break down?

Still, being taken for granted is the worse feeling.
When it seems like you're always the one taking the step,
when you're always the one making the extra effort,
when you're always the one going the extra mile,
it makes you want to walk away from it.

Yet, some things are just too important for you to just simply walk away from.
So you just take the next step, and a next, and a next
and hope that someday you'll find that you're no longer walking alone.

Who gets to say when the old ends and when the new begins?
It's not a date on the calendar. Not a birthday, not a New Year.
It's an event, big or small, something that changes us.

Ideally, it gives us hope.
A new way of living and looking at the world.
Letting go of old habits, old memories.
What's important is that we never stop believing that we can have a new beginning.

But it's also important to remember that it made all the crap and a few things really worth holding on to.

Season 2 Episode 10

Nice songs.
Lifehouse - You and Me
James Blunt - High

How do you know how much is too much?

Too much too soon?
Too much information?
Too much fun?
Too much love?
Too much to ask?
And when is it all just too much to bear?

I got smacked on my face.
Blood has been drawn
but people around me are asking me not to take it personal.

So was it an accident?
No. It was not an accident.
I could see it in his eyes.
Every ounce of flesh that hit my face was filled with vengeance.

I will not retaliate for now
but neither will I back down.

Cross the line and I swear to you that blood will be shed.

Yes... Cheryl has spoken yet again.
And now, I'm the epitome of plagiarism.
I'm the Meredith Grey because I quote her word for word.
I'm not deep because the words never came from my mouth or my own mind.

I beg to differ.

A plea from dearest Cheryl to type something happy.
But Sheares Basketball got knocked out in the semi finals by Temasek Hall.

Losing is never a good feeling.
Neither is mediocrity.



Thanks guys. It has been a wonderful 7 months. The best 7 months of basketball I've ever played in my life. And many more years of good basketball to come.
I remembered the things I said during my 2nd training in Sheares.
"I know I'm not too good a player, but I promise I'll learn and train hard and improve along with the team. Have patience with me."
I can proudly say that the team has improved over the months, and so have I. By leaps and bounds. Not enough, but it is a start. If I keep up with it, I know I can become a main stay player in Sheares too. Continue being part of the legacy.

Must thank Nicholas. He's been my biggest mentor over the last few months. He's showed that everyone in the team counts. He put in his heart to make every player feel like part of the team, teaching without qualms, without holding back, without prejudice. Thanks to Nicholas, I have improved.

Thank Adi and RongTzu for the patience to advice me and guide me over the months of training. My confidence with the ball is definitely building up. Thanks. RongTzu, I'll train double as hard. We may not be tall, we may not be BIG, but we play BIG. I promise I will play big. I will improve in the next one year. I have reached my goal for this IHG. I will set my new goal soon. I will achieve it again.

Thanks FuF. For being my buddies, for this past 7 mths.

Thanks Cheryl. For being so awesome. I wish I were like you. And Dalun, you were (... this part obviously typed by Cheryl and Da Lun, promptly stopped by Bingz)

But maybe sometimes,
it's better to stay in the dark.

In darkness there may be fear,
but also, there is hope.

Whoever said that what you don't know won't hurt you,
must be a complete moron.

Because for most people I know,
not knowing is the worst feeling in the world.

Pain, ou just have to ride it out.
Hope it goes away in time.
Hope the wound that caused it, heals.

There are no solutions, no easy answers,
you just breathe deep and wait for it to subside.

Most of the time, pain can't be managed.
But sometimes, the pain gets healed when you least expect it.

Pain,
you just have to fight through,
because the truth is you can't outrun it.
And life always makes more.

Pain comes in all forms.
The small twinge, a bit of soreness,
the random pain, the normal pains we live with everyday.

Then there's the kind of pain you can't ignore.
A level of pain so great it blocks out everything else.
Makes the rest of the world fade away,
until all we can think about is how much we hurt.

How we manage the pain,
is up to us.

For some of us, the best way to manage pain...
is to just push through.

We only see what we want to see,
and believe what we want to believe.

And it works,
we lie to ourselves so much that after awhile,
the lie starts to seem like the truth.

There's something about a glass half full.
Sometimes, all we want is a taste.
Other times, there's no such thing as enough.
The glass is bottomless.

And all we want...

is more.

You were like coming out for fresh air,
so as I was drowning,
you saved me.

That's all I know.

The thing people forget,
is how good it could feel when you finally set secrets free.

Whether good or bad, at least they're out in the open.
Like it or not.
And once your secrets are out in the open,
you don't have to hide behind them anymore.

The problem with secrets is,
even when you think you're in control...
you're not.

At the end of the day,
Faith is a funny thing.

It turns up when you don't really expect it.
It's like some day you realise that the fairy tale
may be slightly different than you dreamed.
The castle may not be a castle,
and it's not so important that it's happily ever after,
just that it's happy right now.

Once in awhile,
once in a blue moon,
people will surprise you.

And once in awhile,
people may even take your breath away.

I'm living on faith right now.
Like how I don't know what's gonna happen in my mahjong games,
but I live on the faith that I'm not losing my next.
Like how I don't know what's happening between you and me,
but I live on the faith that some day, things will turn out right for us,
that maybe in that once in awhile, once in a blue moon, you'll surprise me
and take my breath away.

Maybe we like the pain.
Maybe we're wired that way.

Without it,
I don't know,
Maybe we just wouldn't feel real.

So why do I keep hitting myself with the hammer?

Because it's gonna feel so good when I stop.

Knowing is better than wondering,
Waking is better than sleeping.

And that even the biggest failure,
Even the worst, most intractable mistake,
Beats the hell out of never trying.

Good game today.

Finally I see my game play improving. Making my shots, getting my kills and winning the games.

Went down to Tanglin for a bout of basketball games today.
Was a good experience. Played 2 games. Won both. Scored more than 20 points out of the 58 total my teams scored.
Too individualistic? But I made quite a number of assists as well. Most of the points I scored are from fast breaks.
My defence improved as well. I can press the guards of the team confidently. Keep it up. Good hustles.
I need to continue improving my game. They may not be able to catch up with my driving, but that cannot be my only weapon.
Else I'd do no good for Sheares Hall Basketball Team. Time to get my shooting up so maybe I can be a new option. A new weapon in the arsenal of Sheares Hall players.

I love playing DOTA with my brothers. In the past 2+ weeks, I haven't lose a single game I played with them in the team.
Fluid team work. It's like we know what each other are gonna do, kills are just too simple. Helped me learn a lot about the game as well. Denies and last hits are going up as well. But not yet at my brothers' levels. 100+ kills by mid game. WTH??? that's almost twice of other usual players.

Of course gaming isn't the only thing I wanna improve. Studies and many other things. Really, I see things going up. And I'm only too glad at the moment. Everything seems bright. Looks like a really good year ahead of me. Really gotta learn to grab opportunities like this and accomplish more.

2007, bring it on.

There's this joy about watching Grey's Anatomy.

You feel familiar with what they are trying to portray. Especially the relationships.

At least, I do.

It's not the chase. No. You and me, it's not the thrill of the chase.
It's not a game. It's your hair, smells good.
And you're very very bouncy, keeps me alive.

=]

Everyone's done their recap and evaluation of Year 2006.

I would only love to look forward to 2007.

I've never felt more lost than in the past year.
I find myself tripping again and again,
having to pick myself up from the falls.
Sometimes on my own, other times I see my friends reaching their hands out for me, pulling me back up, giving me a good pat on my shoulder.

It was the end of my stint in the armed forces.
It was the start of my university life, my life in Sheares Hall.
It was the year I got my licence to drive.
It was the year I celebrated my birthday on a pretty big scale.

I know I'm picking myself up again, ready to take on Year 2007.
My focus is back. And it can only mean good.

This year, I'll still be me. A better version of me.